Elizabeth Lyon, new book for writers! Find Your Novel’s Best Title!

 

Photo: Janelle Meraz Hooper and Elizabeth Lyon

I‘m always being asked about how I work. I like to say I run a one-woman office. That was true at one time. I used to research, write, format, design the cover, print my own business cards, etc.–all from my computer. It was fun and I enjoyed being able to self-publish on Amazon with the click of my mouse.

But times have changed. Thanks to technology (grrr!) it isn’t good enough anymore to write the very best book I can and control everything from research to publishing.

That’s where my editor and her new book, Find Your Novel’s Best Title, comes in. I had a lot of fun designing my covers and choosing my own titles of my first books. The only problem was I stunk at it! 

If you write, get to know a good editor, like Elizabeth before you even get to crafting a title. And read her new book; you won’t be sorry!

While you’re at it, if you self-publish, get a great book formatter like www.BookNook.Biz/ Let Hitch and her people design your book so that it shines like a book that has had a traditional publisher.

More about BookNook’s amazing formatting later on. But if you want to see BookNook’s work, check out my new novel, Geronimo’s Laptop, Historical Fantasy, Humor–available at Amazon in paperback and on Kindle. From start to finish, it is the best!

Why am I telling you this? Because I have over 21,000 subscribers out there…I know some of you have to be writers!

Check out my new novel, Geronimo’s Laptop, on Amazon and get a closeup view of the sample chapter to see an example of their formatting. From cover design to interior, BookNook rocks!

 

 

New podcast and book trailer for Geronimo’s Laptop

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Dear Reader, this post is unusual for me. I know it is cluttered, but my new novel has gotten so much interest that I couldn’t decide what to post. So I posted it all! I may never have such a popular book again! Thank you all!

Hang in there for me. I’m working on plans for this winter that I think you’ll like!

In the meantime, check out the links below. Don’t miss the Toby Gibben’s  podcast. He’s the real star of the podcast he did with me. Thanks Toby. You rock!

Janelle

 My newest podcast: The Toby Gibben Shout Out! Radio podcast from Great Britain:

https://youtu.be/IgCLDaG1Hyo?si=1Bxs5jvPYqGPlDXN 

New Book Trailer for Geronimo’s Laptop!

https://youtu.be/hOwD0yJ3VAY

Are we having fun yet or what?

Check out the photo in the background. I spent the morning touring a wonderful garden in Tucson when we were there to premiere Geronimo, Life on the Reservation. My new novel, Geronimo’s Laptop, is an extension of that show which was closed down because of Covid. Funny how things work out. He was hired immediately to perform in the Yellowstone tv series. The new season of Yellowstone is coming up. Search for it on your tv channels!

Geronimo’s Laptop is now on Kindle! Paperback! and Audible!


Order yours today!

http://amazon.com/author/janellehooper

Audible books can be ordered in the usual places: Barnes & Noble, Kobo, etc.

New Comment on Amazon!

5.0 out of 5 stars Such a creative novel and perfect for all generations
Reviewed in the United States on August 15, 2023
Verified Purchase
Janelle Meraz has captured the old Medicine Man Geronimo during his later years at Ft. Sill, adjacent to Lawton, OK, where she grew up and where every school kid knew who Geronimo was. Her masterful work of allowing 21st-century electronics to help the old Indian make a case for real freedom for his people to return to their homeland hopefully will allow today’s young readers to better know the Chiricahua warrior.

Thank you, Dan Collier

5.0 out of 5 stars Such a creative novel and perfect for all generations
Reviewed in the United States on August 15, 2023
Verified Purchase
Janelle Meraz has captured the old Medicine Man Geronimo during his later years at Ft. Sill, adjacent to Lawton, OK, where she grew up and where every school kid knew who Geronimo was. Her masterful work of allowing 21st century electronics to help the old Indian make a case for real freedom for his people to return to their homeland hopefully will allow today’s young readers to better know the Chiricahua warrior.

dan collier

5.0 out of 5 stars Such a creative novel and perfect for all generations
Reviewed in the United States on August 15, 2023
Verified Purchase
Janelle Meraz has captured the old Medicine Man Geronimo during his later years at Ft. Sill, adjacent to Lawton, OK, where she grew up and where every school kid knew who Geronimo was. Her masterful work of allowing 21st century electronics to help the old Indian make a case for real freedom for his people to return to their homeland hopefully will allow today’s young readers to better know the Chiricahua warrior.


An excerpt from Geronimo’s Laptop

One of my favorite characters in Geronimo’s Laptop is an old settler named Jo, who tells Geronimo she has sold her farm to the government and is heading West. The bonnet she is wearing in the book is just like the bonnet my grandmother made for me when she told her stories about life on a wagon train with her new husband. I still have it, it’s the same one in the photo! Writers tend to be very archival, you know…

“What do you do during the day, Mr. Geronimo?” asks a woman with weathered skin and her hair pulled back in a tight bun. Her faded calico dress in a floral fabric and faded calico bonnet older than her dress makes her look like one of the original settlers. Geronimo has seen these cotton hats before. Designed with a wide brim, they tie under the chin with a fabric tie and unbutton at the back so a woman can lay it flat to dry after it is washed. She is quite a contrast from the women wearing fancy beribboned bonnets with flowers and dead birds decorating the top he usually sees. In her own way, she is a lot more interesting.
Why is she here? Geronimo wonders if he and his warriors ever hurt one of her family members. It is unlikely. Mainly Comanches and Kiowas roamed the area when Indians were free. Even so, he approaches her cautiously, but she remains quiet and polite.
“Do you live around here, ma’am?” Geronimo asks gently.
“Call me Jo. I did. But not anymore. The government just bought my farm kit and caboodle for a pretty penny. I’m catching the next train west to live with my daughter in California.”
“Are you sad to leave, Jo?”
“Hell, no! Two days ago, my well ran dry and my last cow died. This morning, just when I was wondering how I was going to bury poor old Bessie all by myself, there was a knock on the door and a man with a briefcase showed me a check with a lot of zeros on it. I tried to be honest and tell him the well had run dry. He said that was okay. Then, I told him my last cow had just died. He said he was sorry to hear it, but that was okay too. Then, I told him the house is falling apart. He said it didn’t matter because they were going to blow it to smithereens with their cannons anyway. Quicker than a turtle on roller skates, I shoved some clean clothes into my carpet bag, threw in a few photos, and hitched a ride back to town with him.” As Geronimo was walking away, she said, “I do feel real sorry for Bessie though. Poor cow deserved a decent burial. I asked the man if he could help me bury her real quick but he said he hadn’t brought a shovel. I told him I had one but I don’t think he heard me,” she says, feigning puzzlement.
The rest of Geronimo’s visitors grab whatever they can reach to hide their laughter. Men hide their faces behind their hats; women hold their purses in front of their grins. Jo’s sense of humor is so unexpected. Only a strong woman could live such a hard life and keep such a sense of humor. Although Geronimo had never met Jo when the Apaches were fighting the settlers, he remembers other women who must have been just like her. Strong. Resilient. Brave. Determined. Geronimo will never forget her. Or them.
A carriage pulls up. Jo’s ride to the train station has arrived.
Geronimo picks up the thread of his spiel before he met Jo, but his unexpected encounter with a former foe makes it difficult. “If I’m not having my picture taken somewhere or downtown sitting under the big bank clock selling my bows and arrows to tourists, I’m with my cattle. The army promised me no one will take our cattle unless we sell them. That’s a big deal because Naiche and I have helped Apaches to raise a huge herd and they’re worth hundreds of thousands of dollars. Yeah. I’m not kidding you.” When he hears laughter, he immediately knows his audience is not laughing about his cows. They are laughing about poor Bessie. Stifling a chuckle, Geronimo charges determinedly on, accepting he has lost control of this visit hijacked by a pioneer woman and her dead cow…

Top reviews from the United States on Amazon

Newest-

5.0 out of 5 stars HOOKED FROM PAGE ONE!

Reviewed in the United States on July 3, 2023

Verified Purchase

GERONIMO’S LAPTOP is a story of survival, strength, loss, heartbreak, and wonder. Humor is woven throughout the story, from its imaginative premise of a mystical laptop to the characters themselves. Janelle Meraz Hooper respects her subject and the circumstances and times that shaped his life. GERONIMO’S LAPTOP is a powerful and engaging history lesson. “In this way, Geronimo tells the story of his people: the pain mixed with humor. The humor mixed with pain. The sadness mixed with both.” (from page 32) VFG

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John W Brees

5.0 out of 5 stars In an Alternate Universe
Reviewed in the United States on June 1, 2023
This was a fascinating story. Part history lesson, part science fiction, part speculative fiction, and entirely spot on. History is written by the victors, and the conquered rarely get a chance to tell their side. In Geronimo’s Laptop, however, author Janelle Meraz Hooper has finally done just that. It’s Geronimo as you’ve never encountered him before – human, pragmatic, philosophical, and determined to set the record straight. There’s humor, but it’s muted with the burden of truth it carries.

Geronimo’s personal liberty might have been reduced to the confines of Fort Sill Indian Reservation in Oklahoma, but his reputation could not be contained. As the American public sought out this living relic of Native America so they could say they had actually seen the infamous Geronimo and actually spoken with him, Geronimo milked their curiosity for all it was worth. And the laptop. Oh, yes. This technological marvel with supernatural programming is the icing on the cake. Essentially, Geronimo is past, present, and future. It’s an intriguing concept.

The bottom line, however, is that the reader finally gets to read the other side of the story, and it’s tough going. It’s an eye-opener for those of us who accepted what we’d been taught as gospel. Is there justice, after all? Perhaps. The lesson here is to question. Always question what you’ve been told. And in the questioning, the truth may finally be told.

Geronimo’s Laptop is history the way it should be taught. It’s got the hook, for sure. It’s also got the facts. Highly recommended.
Read less

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Elizabeth Lyon

5.0 out of 5 stars Gotta love Geronimo’s WeSquawk network
Reviewed in the United States on May 29, 2023
This story made me laugh and cry. Worth reading many times and recommending to others. Geronimo’s Laptop is among the most unique historical humor fantasies on earth! Set in Fort Sill, where the Apaches became POWs, Geronimo receives visitors and answers their questions. He’s well aware of his celebrity and does everything to utilize it to set the record straight, petition for his people’s freedom, and make money to help his tribe. Janelle Meraz Hooper, author of many novels, historical and modern and humorous (and some serious), adds the fantasy element of Geronimo using a laptop, that he, well, “borrowed” from one of the officers who is away from the base. With his setup of WeSquawk network, he can reach out to other “Indians,” dead or alive. Hooper deftly keeps suspense in the air through the mysterious appearances of white feathers, delivered from an unknown man, often to Geronimo’s beloved wife, and trying to locate the missing lieutenant who most understood and helped Geronimo.

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DEL

5.0 out of 5 stars Entertaining, Enlightening and Educational!
Reviewed in the United States on May 30, 2023
Who would’ve thought Geronimo would ever use a laptop to communicate? Entertaining, educational, fantastical and fun. A very inventive way into the life of one of America’s most misunderstood historical figures. Geronimo lives… to send emails!


Buy now on Amazon.com  https://www.amazon.com/author/janellehooper

Geronimo’s Laptop, historical fantasy/humor/ novel

In January, 2021, The Los Angeles Times chose Geronimo, Life on the Reservation as one of its Nineteen Culture Picks. My novel, Geronimo’s Laptop, is a companion piece to this play.

Buy now on Amazon. Paperback. Suitable for most.

Rosa’s Rattlesnake Resort


photo by CloverPhoto

Rosa’s Rattlesnake Resort
Janelle Meraz Hooper

This is a true story. Not all of my “adventures” with my dad happened in Oklahoma. Some of them were in Texas and other places. This story was supposed to be in As Brown As I Want, The Indianhead Diaries, but I thought three murder attempts in the book were enough to make my point, so I cut it out. As Brown As I Want was a finalist in the 2004 Oklahoma Book Awards.

I was the perfect kid to grow up in Oklahoma. From childhood, I’d entertained myself by watching the bugs, spiders, and other interesting insects in my dad’s backyard. I was never bored.

Dad never noticed the critters in his grass and trees. All he cared about was his chickens, ducks, and rabbits. He kept the chickens in the hen house, everything else he kept in wire cages. Those were for us to eat, so I couldn’t play with them. I hated the chickens, especially the rooster. At seven years old, it was my job to collect the eggs every morning and the rooster would fly at my face with his claws aimed right for my face and screech like some Japanese warrior. The hens were on my bad side too, because, every night, they flew over the wire fence and slept on the branches of our peach trees. Well, I liked peaches, but even I wouldn’t eat a poopy peach.

His backyard sat over an underground water reservoir that we drew our garden water from. He told me that the fish down there didn’t have eyes. Didn’t need them, he said, because it was dark all the time underground. I wanted to fish in that well and try to catch one of them but Dad wouldn’t let me. I think he was a little bit afraid I might catch one and who knows? Maybe they had teeth! Or, maybe, he was afraid I’d fall in and pollute his garden water. I’ll never know.

Luckily, we had relatives in Benavides, Texas. I had a big surprise when we visited my stepmother’s mother there. Her backyard was all sand and cacti! How great was that? That’s where the fun was. The last time we visited there, Sarah’s mother was sick and confined to bed. Dad and Sarah were having a big argument about what to do with her, so they threw me out in the backyard to play. I didn’t mind a bit that it was really hot outside because it was hotter inside. My dad was yelling a lot and the little one-room house’s walls were shaking from his anger.

At first, I thought there was nothing to do out there because there wasn’t even a place to sit. No chairs or nothing and the sand was almost hot enough to burn my feet through my sandals. The whole backyard was fence-to-fence cacti. Big ones. To pass the time, I picked up some small rocks and tossed them into the cacti that were so crowded  I couldn’t see in between the plants.

From the first rock I threw, I thought I was the luckiest girl I knew. Every time I threw a rock, I’d hear the rattle of rattlesnakes. It was like they had their own little resort in that backyard. I picked up handfuls of small rocks and moved all around the edge of the yard and every time I tossed one of them into the cactus, I heard rattles! I wanted to see one so bad and I figured that if I made them mad enough, eventually one of them would come out.

But no luck. After a while, I turned my attention to the house, which was propped up on cinder blocks. All kinds of garbage were stuffed under there that they didn’t want anymore. Things like rusty barbed wire, old buckets with holes in them, and old wooden fence posts that were too rotten to use.

And then I found a real treasure: there among all of that junk was a perfect skeleton of a frog. All bones, and no skin at all. He was sitting on the sand like nothing was wrong—he was just enjoying the landscape. I figured maybe one of those snakes bit him and he died on the spot. I was just getting ready to find something to put him in so I could take him home when the yelling and crying inside the house got worse. It sounded like Dad was on one side of the hospital bed and Sarah was on the other. In the middle was Sarah’s mother, Rosa.

Dad was yelling that no way he was going to take that old Mexican home to live with them. “She don’t even speak English,” he scoffed. Sarah was yelling that she was her mother and she wanted to take her home to live with them…forever!

I decided I’d better get away from there quick and come back to pick up the frog before we left. I wandered around and found a little grocery store down the street where the man who owned it didn’t speak English but I didn’t even have enough money to buy a pop to drink so it didn’t matter. I hadn’t eaten all day but it was too hot to eat anyway. What I really wanted was one of those tall, frosted glass candles with a picture of the Virgin Mary on the front. I thought it would look nice in the rattlesnake resort. One was lit up and it looked real pretty. The grocer had boxes of them. Maybe his customers lost their power a lot?

After a while, I decided I’d better get back before they missed me and I’d be in as much trouble as Sarah’s mom. I was just in time. They had just started to look for me. I guess the argument was settled. Sarah was crying and Dad was opening the car doors to let some cool air into the car. It was obvious Rosa was not going back to Oklahoma with us. He was still mad as heck even though he’d won the argument.

I knew better than to keep Dad waiting. I dove into the backseat so fast I forgot my frog skeleton. I didn’t remember it until we were out of town. I didn’t dare ask Dad to take me back so I could get it. I told myself that maybe it would still be there if we ever went back. ‘Course we never did. I guess Dad had worn out his welcome there for good.
After we got back to Lawton, I never heard another word about Sarah’s mother. Not a word. It was just like Benavides, Texas—and Rosa—never existed.

The end

                                    Please share this post. My thanks, Janelle  

Photo: At the beach, no makeup, no hair dryer, no sunscreen.

HEAVEN!

Halloween-Sanyo and Hatchet

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Sanyo was warned not to make eye contact with the big black jungle crows that roamed the streets of downtown Tokyo…
They were not ordinary crows, but huge birds with wingspans of over three feet that flew in large intimidating gangs, tipped over garbage cans, and viciously attacked people they didn’t like who made direct eye contact with them. Hostile and vindictive, the mean-tempered birds were said to never forget a face.

Sanyo, six years old, didn’t believe the warnings. They were just birds. From her upstairs bedroom window on the top floor of a deluxe, high-rise condominium, she watched them as they cawed and chased passersby on the busy Tokyo street below. She didn’t think the birds were dangerous, just bad-mannered.

One day, Neko, Sanyo’s nanny, put a tray of tea and cookies on Sanyo’s play table and softly closed the door behind her. The young girl had dressed herself in her best ceremonial kimono, hoping to have tea with her mother. Sadly, she realized she’d again have afternoon tea alone in her bedroom; her mother was still at the office.

As she had so many times before, Sanyo lined up all of her beautiful dolls at her tea table and poured tea into tiny china cups. She would have tea with her friends. Her only friends. Neko wouldn’t let her play with the other children in the condominium. It was easier to just keep her in her room.

The child was uneasy and looked up to see one of the crows on her windowsill. Surprised at how large the bird looked close-up, she forgot the warnings from her parents and made direct eye contact with him. The bird stared back. Sanyo thought he must want the cookie, so she opened the window just wide enough to stick it out. The crow rudely yanked the snack out of her hand and swallowed it whole, then forced his way into her room.

Sanyo called out for Neko, but her calls were unanswered. Angry and jealous that Sanyo had so many beautiful things, he flew right for her beloved dolls. With methodical hatefulness, he marched over their laps and plucked the eyes from each one. Each time he moved to a new doll, he looked back at the stunned child who stood paralyzed with fear on the other side of the room. When there were no eyes left to pluck, the crow made a swing past Sanyo’s face and stabbed his hatchet beak toward her eyes. It was a warning: Sanyo had better not ever cross him.

He departed through the still open window with a string of caws that ricocheted between the buildings and shot down the street. The other crows answered his call, and soon the sky was black with the crow and its friends.

Sanyo ran to her dolls, but there was nothing to be done. The bird’s beak had crushed each eyeball into powder. The next day, Hatchet, as Sanyo had begun to call him, was back on the windowsill. The youngster, alone again, turned her back to him as she served tea to her dolls and nervously ate her cookie. The crow became more and more angry and threatening as he cawed.

Sanyo was too terrified to look at the bird. As Hatchet repeatedly stabbed at the glass with his giant bill, she quietly served her sightless dolls another cup of tea. To make sure the crow never got into the house again, Sanyo got up before the sun rose each day and rushed around the house to make sure all of the windows were shut tight and locked.

She was on her own; both of her parents worked, and they were tired when they got home at night. She knew they’d have no patience to listen to her story about Hatchet. Her nanny, who was also the cook, kept to her kitchen most of the time. She had scant interest in Sanyo when she was happy. She’d have even less interest in Sanyo if she had a problem.

Then, one day, Sanyo had to go downstairs for her cookies and tea. Neko halfheartedly apologized for not bringing it up to her and said she was busy making a special meal for her parents who had been working very hard. The table was so heavily laden with platters full of all kinds of noodles, rice dishes, sushi, intricately cut vegetables, and exotic fruits that Sanyo couldn’t see the countertop.

Too late, she noticed a high window above the cabinets whose curtains blew in the breeze. Neko had opened the window! Sanyo ran for the long crank that was used to shut it, but she was too late. Hatchet flew in with a loud caw and landed on the kitchen counter right on top of the platter of fancy sushi.

Neko dropped her knife, screamed, and ran from the kitchen with her arms flailing. She never so much as looked back at Sanyo, who sat frozen with fear in her chair.  As the crow stomped over the elaborate dishes with his grimy, gnarled feet, he never took his eyes off Sanyo’s cookie.

Sanyo was so frightened she lost her grip on the treat and it rolled over to the edge of the big double sink and fell in. Caught up in the chase, the crow flew after it, his big black claws slid around on the shiny sink interior as he tried in vain to catch the rolling cookie. Hatchet didn’t stop his pursuit when the cookie spun and slid into the garbage disposal. He barely paused before he stretched out his long neck and went right into the disposal after it.

Sanyo saw her chance. With lightning speed, she reached over and flipped on the switch to the appliance. Her eyes widened when she heard one surprised shriek as the blades ground the crow’s beak into a fine powder, not unlike her dolls’ eyes. When the giant bird was finally able to withdraw his body and flap headless around the kitchen, he spewed blood, guts, and loose feathers all over Neko’s special dinner.

Sanyo was about to hop down from her chair and run to her room when something in the sink caught her eye. There among the blood and feathers was an egg that Hatchet had carried. She was a mother! She nudged the egg into the disposal with a wooden spoon and once again, flipped the switch on the wall. Now she would never have to fear another Hatchet. It was over.

Still stunned, she turned her back on the mess and calmly went upstairs; she left her cowardly nanny to clean up the bloody feathers and bones. Halfway up the stairs, the shock began to wear off, and a suddenly confident Sanyo went to her room to pack up her dolls in a cardboard box. Her parents would surely buy her new ones—and get her a new nanny.

When she opened the door to her room she was met with seven pairs of black eyes that stared at her from her windowsill. Eyes filled with pure hate. A cold chill ran down her back as she realized they knew.

Knew about Hatchet.

Knew about the disposal.

Knew about the egg.

By their stares, she could tell that they wouldn’t rest until they got even. Sadly, Sanyo realized it was not over after all. That night, she lay sleepless in her bed and shivered with terror as she listened to the crows as they ripped through the shingles on the roof above her room. Rrrr-ip, rrr-rip, rrr-ip…not the end

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Please share this story.

My thanks, Janelle

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My first Halloween costume, 1948